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I'm still alive  
12:10am 31/05/2013
Wow, for a second there I was sitting on the couch unsatisfyingly pinning things (Pinterest was so hugely satisfying for me until like, a week ago, and suddenly that changed for no identifiable reason, and now there's a void to fill) and thinking "God I need to vent. If only I had an appropriate outlet for that" and then I was like "Oh, Livejournal probably still exists."

So my mind is like a broken record these days. It's getting annoying. All I think about is "Holy shit I need to get a new job." What's really triggered this is that I moved recently, total upgrade in apartment but further away from work. So I'm commuting like an hour fifteen minutes. To my restaurant job. So yeah, what always follows is this circular train of thought:

"What am I going to do? Option 1: Get a new restaurant job in Denver. Could work, but who knows if I could even get a job and if I do I'm starting at the bottom and who knows how long till I'm making money enough to pay my bills. Who knows if I'm working more than I want to (like I am at Jay's). Who knows if the staff are a bunch of bitch-ass dick faces (like they were at Earl's). Could be a miserable waste of time and energy and at its very best will be yet another restaurant job. Option 2: Try to get a job in a different field. Sounds good. But I'm so unqualified. All I have is a Bachelor's degree in English and a million years of experience working in a restaurant. I'm even underqualified for unpaid internships. How do people do this again? Shouldn't "How to Get a Fucking Job" have been a class in college? Option 3: Give it a shot freelance copywriting (I've been writing for Textbroker lately but the money is, uh, not good. Thinking about applying at some other sites) and working on my Etsy store full time. But...don't know how I'll make the money I need. Sounds good to try but only if I had a fund to fall back on. How do I get money and still work on my projects? Well...work at Jay's. If only they would stop scheduling me so fucking much I would have time to work on my projects. They just hired some girls...maybe at some point they'll stop scheduling me so fucking much. Guess I'll just wait it out." And then after an annoying/bad/long/any shift I'm like "Holy shit I need to get a new job" and the fun starts all over again!

So yeah, I have had no luck whatsoever with my Etsy store. Open since October, I have had a total of 3 sales and they have all been to family and friends. I was not getting discouraged. I was gonna just keep trying, and sewing, and listing, and I have been, with no success. Yesterday I listed my very favorite work I've done to date on my store, and also posted it to Facebook, which I've never done. I didn't even announce my shop opening on my Facebook because I wasn't very confident in it and am terrified of criticism. But I loved this damn pillow cover that I made and I posted it to Facebook expecting to get a few likes and a few encouraging comments.

Um, fast forward to tonight and...nothing. Like I mean the only person who even acknowledged my status was my fiance, and I'm pretty sure he's legally required to. And I know I sound like an idiot who's annoyingly emotionally invested in Facebook and needs Likes to feel accepted and hey, yeah I guess I am but I just posted my work with total confidence and got crickets. I know that the fact that nobody said anything on my status doesn't actually mean that everybody hates me and thinks my work is ugly, but it's hard not to feel that way when I have had so little success at this and at least thought I might get a fucking Facebook thumbs up.

So anyone who is reading this and feels like doing me a huge personal favor despite the negligent friend I've been, I'd absolutely love it if you'd go to www.etsy.com/shop/KatForhanDesigns and just give me a little completely honest feedback. Whether my pictures suck, my pricing is wrong, my banner is too kitschy, or just that you think my work looks sloppy or ugly or I'm colorblind or whatever, I'd really honestly love to hear it. I've discovered it's pretty hard to be objective about your own work and thus I feel like I have no idea what people see when they look at my shop.

So anyway, I've been up since 4am and I'm pretty sure my brain just officially shut down, so I think it's time to stop trying to make words. Goodnight and love you, seriously.
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(no subject)  
11:31pm 10/11/2011
Hoping that writing an entry promising to write a real entry tomorrow will help me write a real entry tomorrow. Lots to catch up on, life has been super hectic for the last month or so changing jobs, and of course there's Kauai (where I met Jessy!) to write about. I'm so lame at this these days. Just so you know I know.
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Tube dress  
12:29pm 29/07/2011
Okay so again I suck at taking pictures, but here's my latest project.



It's hard to tell from the pictures, but that's a belt. It's also hard to tell this from the pictures, but I really need to learn how to hem. Still, progress is encouraging! I would actually wear this in public!

My life is prettttty uneventful lately. Work is work, busy so that's good, coming closer and closer to paying off my credit card bill...Matt is great, life is good. Just been watching a lot of Project Runway and ruining a lot of fabric :)
mood: accomplishedaccomplished
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(no subject)  
01:01am 07/07/2011
So, opened the pantry a few minutes ago to find...

Luna Bars!

I don't know why I find it so infinitely charming and adorable that Matt randomly bought me these but I do.
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My First (Semi) Successful Sewing Project  
02:06pm 05/07/2011
Okay, it's not exactly runway ready. But here's my first attempt at a dress.Collapse )
mood: chipperchipper
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(no subject)  
11:32am 13/04/2011
It's been a successful few days! Got my table:


(Still trying to figure out what to do with the bookcase)

My books:


(Still waiting for the 6th one but I've got 600 pages to knock out in the meantime)

AND my CAR!:


05 Honda Civic EX. Unfortunately I haven't driven it yet, and won't till Friday (which is when I get the Interlock installed) but I have a car!
mood: excitedexcited
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Well we're all in the mood for a melody  
09:30am 26/01/2011
Just cause I'm really excited about it...In the last several months I've been playing a lot of keyboard, and I was getting sorta over having to use my whole coffee table and play from my couch, and Monday I get home and Matt has brought over this:


And not only is that a keyboard stand, it's his Casio, which is about 600 times nicer than my old Yamaha.


Oh and here's what else he had brought over.


I like my boyfriend.
mood: happyhappy
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Just cause I thought it was funny  
11:33am 18/01/2011
Was doing laundry and noticed the tag on the Boulder County Caregivers shirt I bought from my old dispensary said this:

"Take care of your shirt and the earth: Wash cold and hang dry. Take care of yourself: eat good food and make sure to rest sometimes."
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(no subject)  
06:49pm 21/08/2010
OMFG. Sometimes I can't help but think that the Man is out to get me.

So I was on my way to work on Thursday, about 6 blocks from my apartment, and noticed a cop behind me. Okay, no big deal. Wasn't doing anything illegal. OR SO I THOUGHT. The cop was behind me for about 3 blocks before the lights went on. What a feeling that is, seein those lights. So I pulled over, trying to figure out what I'd done. The cop told me he'd pulled me over because I had an "obstructed" windshield: meaning I had a 2 inch air freshener hanging from my mirror and I have a crack about 6 inches from the passenger side edge of the windshield. Basically nowhere near my field of vision. So I was relieved, again thinking "no big deal", until the cop runs my license and then tells me that IT ISN'T VALID. He was like "Does "Incomplete Level 2 Education" mean anything to you?"

In fact it does mean a whole hell of a lot to me, I spent 96 hours of my life in Level 2 Education (alcohol class) and I finished it IN MARCH. Apparently the DMV was missing that record (but this was the first I'd heard about it, obviously). The cop told me that he could tow my car and take me to jail. He didn't, and it was probably a combination of the fact that I was completely bewildered when he told me this and the fact that I was a cute young girl on the verge of tears, and thank God for that. I was like "I'm on my way to work..." He told me to do what I had to do but that he wouldn't recommend driving till this was straightened out.

Good thing I just moved 50 miles away from my workplace.

So yeah, I tracked down the paperwork and spent 3 and a half hours at the DMV yesterday, to be told I have to mail in paperwork and ANOTHER $95 reinstatement fee and will probably be without a valid license for weeks. FUCKING AWESOME.
mood: stressedstressed
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You know you're drunk when...  
10:26am 15/07/2010
Just because I laughed out loud when I read this...

Of course in unpacking boxes I find journals and when I find journals I open and read journals, so an excerpt from my April 22 entry, 2001:

"You know you're drunk when you vomit all over yourself and the back of your friend's car and don't even make an effort to move your face"

Yeah that would be a good clue.
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